The house is basically empty. We have suitcases and electronics yet, but all of the furniture except that which we are giving away, is gone. The house is constantly filled with fixer-upper clutter despite trying to sort and go through things. I hope to get the to-do list done each day, just so I can read. The crazy moving prep days are over, our stuff is on a truck being carted to a ship.
Packers packed us up in a day. Movers packed the 10 crates in a little over a day. We had a rain delay the first day.
I had a moment today as I was driving home from running errands. I almost started crying in the car. I figured out why almost as soon as I started. I am so ready to leave and yet I hate change. I feel so conflicted. Except for the few bright spots, our homeschool group and our weekly fire pit/supper group days, this duty station has not been the most enjoyable.
Our beautiful red house, has been the place of peace on those days of mean girls, and lost jobs, and even frustration in caring for this home. Yet still, a place of peace. Don’t get me wrong, there are moments of great frustration and, honestly, anger, and sinfulness. But this house has been so wonderful. I think that’s why we’re keeping it and renting it out. Not only for just the equity and that piece of terra firma, but also so that someone else would find a place of peace while they are here too.
And so I don’t want to leave it. But I want to get out of here.
I want to see some different trees besides crepe myrtles and pines. I want to experience cold weather again. I want to wear snow boots and drink glühwein. To go to Kurbisfest (Pumpkin festival), to see Bavaria, and England, and maybe Italy and Spain. It’s time to see a different piece of earth.
This crazy military life shapes us and makes us wanderers. Some people don’t like this part, but I marvel at how many places I have seen. The red house will be here in a few years. Will we sell it then? I don’t know. But for now, even though we’re leaving it with mixed emotions, I am still thankful for it. The Lord will bring us new experiences that shape us and change us and for that I am thankful.
I let go, knowing that each breath and each day and each experience is a gift. As this house has been. May those who live in it after us, find peace.